"What we plant in the soil of contemplation, we shall reap in the harvest of action." -Meister Eckhart
Wild Goose Festival 2017 is over. It was a roaring, whispering, wild success. We are sore and jubilant. But our work is just beginning.
A week of action as intense as Wild Goose requires much contemplation. In fact, it requires a year's worth of listening, loving, sitting, being still. Our work ahead, for many of us, is to let our action diminish for a time, and let the Spirit now comfort us and feed us.
But this begs the question: what, exactly, is contemplation, especially in the context of following Jesus? Let me give you the words of Thomas Merton, Trappist monk and writer of many books about prayer:
"Contemplation is a mystery in which God reveals Himself as the very center of our own inmost self."
When I read that I am stopped short of breath.
To begin with, I deeply struggle with the concept of Christ being the center of my deepest self. I say this as a deeply individual person who spends a great deal of time being introspective. It seems too amazing, too incredible, too infinite, to be true. Do I even understand who Christ is? How, then, can I truly know myself?
This sentence is merely a rewording of the Apostle Paul's own confession, "I no longer live, but Christ lives in me." If my deepest self is Christ, and your deepest self is Christ, then suddenly in my mind I have a clearer picture of what it truly means to be unified with other Christians. Our deepest selves are united, and truly, we are the body of Christ. This actually makes me very uncomfortable.
To know that my deepest self is, in fact, oneness with the Creator--to know this is contemplation. But in fact, knowing in this sense is not an intellectual pursuit. It is an experiential one. This is the road of contemplation, and it is not an easy road.
"The outward work will never be puny if the inward work is great." -Meister Eckhart.
These words, written by a 14th century Dominican monk, carry universal wisdom. It is no small thing to sit in contemplation, to wonder at the mystery of God-to feed on this mystery-to let the beauty of nature calm us and enter into our hearts. It is, in fact, great work, a work of patience and perseverance. It is choosing to engage in the Spirit within us instead of listening to the noise of the world, to return, again and again, to the Life inside of us. When we are faithful to the process, faithful to our deepest self day after day, great work is produced out of our hearts.
I'd like to share one more passage from Merton:
"There are thousands of Christians walking about the face of the earth bearing in their bodies the infinite God of whom they know practically nothing. They are themselves children of God, and are not aware of their identity. Instead of seeking to know themselves and their true dignity, they struggle miserably to impersonate the alienated characters whose "greatness" rests on violence, craftiness, lust and greed. ... God does not manifest Himself to these souls because they do not seek Him with any real desire. ... But desire is the most important thing in the contemplative life. Without desire we will never receive the great gifts of God." -Merton, Inner Experience
This passage to me sums up the challenge ahead of us as we prepare for another year of Desanka: will we pursue "our own dignity," by which Merton means the boundless depths of Jesus? Or will we be distracted by the many impersonators that populate our world, our media, our news? And besides all that, how do I cultivate desire for the gifts of God?
I don't have too many answers. But I do know that Christ in me is like an alpine meadow hidden in my heart. This place is full of sunshine, joy, and freedom. Every day, like climbing a mountain, I try to reach the meadow. I don't always make it, but when I do, I find it ready to receive all of me. My pain, my doubts, my fears, are all welcome, and in the light of this serene place, they seem so much smaller and insignificant than before.
I want to move forwards in the next few weeks with the deep intention of listening, waiting, and sinking down into the process of contemplation. I hope that your post-WGF routine finds all of us connecting with Spirit in the oh-so-important quiet ways that feed not only us, but the world through us.
Blessings on the journey and Desanka on!